三顾茅庐英文版视频

篇一：三顾茅庐英文版话剧剧本

(来自:www.sMHaiDa.com 海 达范文网:三顾茅庐英文版视频)

刘：Hi,man,how is everything going?

仆：Who are you?

关：Baga,this is our big brother ,Mr,Liu,who is handsome and strong.

张:Fucking man,who are you?

刘：Be polite! Does Mr,Zhu live here?

诸葛：Shit, it's Mr Zhuge,not mr.zhu

刘：I'm sorry ,does Mr.Zhuge live here?

仆：Yes ,i'm his servant ,why do you come here? 刘：I want .......

张：Fuck off,guy, I saw him,let's go,brother!

刘：Yaoxi. (见到诸葛亮，握住诸葛的手），how long no see,i look for you very hard.

诸葛：Who are you?

关：Baga.this is our big brother ,mr,liu,who is handsome and strong.

诸葛：Saoga,why do you look for ma?

刘：Oh,well.I want you to be my assistant to help me unite the whole nation.

诸葛：Help you? Are you serious?(搓手指，表示要钱） 刘：（把钱呈上）

诸葛：

Is this all?

刘：Not enough?

诸葛：No money no talking! See you!

刘：Greedy guy!(关张对着诸葛竖中指）

刘关张转身离开，然后回来（一天过去。。。。）

刘：Hi ,Mr Zhuge,(朝着诸葛挥手）

仆：Stop and be quiet, mr zhuge is resting....

关张：Fuck off(关张进去推醒诸葛）

张：Ai,guy, are you dead?

诸葛：What are you doing? I'm resting. Rude guys!

刘：Hi, do you remember me? Yesterday, we had a cheerful talk,and today I take more money to satisfy you.

诸葛：Money ? No.today I want a beauty...do you got it? 刘：What? Beauty ? Fuck you . Lustful guy.(转身离开）

刘关张转身离开，然后回来（一天过去。。。。） 刘：Hi ,guy man,what 's up?

仆：I'm fine ,thank you,and you?

张：Fuck off, let' go ,brother....

刘：Mr zhuge ,today I take a beauty and much money to meet you needs (刘备指向老师）. What's you opinion abou being my assistant?

诸葛：Good , 卡哇伊！Ok,I'm yours.....

篇二：英语搞笑话剧——三顾茅庐

Three visits to the cottage

主要人物：诸葛亮、诸葛家仆人（朱不亮）、刘备、关羽、张飞、旁白（同时操作电脑）

旁白：

Three visits to the cottage（中文名三顾茅庐） is a story from one of the Four Great

classical Chinese novels——the Three Kindoms. ZhuGeliang is one of the

main

characters in the original. Also, he is an outstanding militarist, politician and the

symbol of the wisdom in Chinese history. Another main actors——Liubei, who

visited ZhuGeliang's thatched cottage three times and wanted to invite him to

be his military adviser. Finally, ZhuGeliang was moved by Liubei' sincerity, helped

the three brothers——Liubei, Guanyu and Zhangfei to establish the Shu Kindom.

Now，let’s go into the story.

第一幕

屋子中，诸葛亮在屋里走着，

诸葛亮：Buliang，this classroom is so dirty，猪不亮扫地，送水（营养快线）

三兄弟上场，关羽（头巾），刘备（墨镜），张飞（不停打嗝） 刘：饭后一支烟，赛过活神仙

A cigerate after dinner plays an important role in my life.（伸手，张飞点烟，刘深吸一口，长舒一口气）

刘：嗯？没点着

En? It dosen’t burn on.

张飞：凑合着吧，老师不让抽烟

Sorry，we can only has this.We can’t smoke in the classroom!

关羽：此番前来，定要邀请的卧龙先生

We must invite Mr.Zhu Geliang!

张飞：必须的，老曹太欺负人了

Certainly,Mr.Cao bully us too much.

三人来到门前，石头剪子布

刘备：According to our custom？

关羽：OK.

张飞：No problem.

刘备三人进行石头剪子布，刘备输了，其余两人把刘备推到前面。

刘备作出一幅英勇就义的姿态，（上海滩响起）

刘备作按门铃状，（门铃声响起）。

诸葛亮：Bu liang（不亮）, go to open the door.

仆人：Heng!(哼)

仆人板着个脸到了门口，做了一个甩头的动作，并呼啦呼啦头发，然后深呼吸，放平稳，保持微笑。然后打开门，举了个躬。 仆人：?????(发音a ni ha sai yao~~~，中文意思：你好) 刘备：Can you speak English?

关羽：（紧接着刘备）Can you speak Chinese?

张飞：（紧接着）Can you speak Japanese?

刘备：（紧接着）Spanish?

关羽：（紧接着）Congolese?

张飞：（紧接着）Egyptian?

仆人：（紧接着）Shut up! Who are you people?

刘备：(摆个pose)I’m Liubei.

关羽：(也摆个pose)I’m Guanyu.

张飞：(同样摆个pose，把关羽碰倒了)I’m Sorry.

刘备三人赶紧把仆人扶起来。

猪不亮：你们怎么来的啊

What do you three take to come here?

张飞：骑马来的啊，做骑马状

Riding a horse ,of course.

猪不亮：那你们怎么骑马来的啊？

So,How do you riding a horse?

三人面面相觑，猪不亮关门

刘备突然明白了，“money！！”

张飞关羽耸肩都没带钱，下台

第二幕

三兄弟上台，张飞关羽手提礼品

关羽猥琐的说:这次应该可以了吧，上?a href="http://www.zw2.cn/zhuanti/guanyuwozuowen/" target="_blank" class="keylink">我苍刮颐?/p>

I think we’ll manage it this time.

张飞：啥啊，如果你不是拉着我，老子一嗓子吼死他（做咆哮状，

老虎声音）

What? If you don’t pull me,I will easily kill him with my strong throat!

刘备：行了，行了，我们来干啥来了

稍息。。。立正。。。（张飞关羽照做）

Stop,stop,What are we doing here? At ease!—Attention! 刘备：都给我机灵点（张飞关羽点头答应）

You three! Be clever this time!

屋子中??

（英文歌，诸葛亮和猪不亮正喝酒，猪不亮哼着英语歌，他两个喝醉了）

诸葛亮：MY GOD！！上天你为什么这么惩罚我

My God!! Why do you punish me?!

猪不亮：老大别难过，班长杨超不也没过吗

Don’t be sad,my boss. As I know,our monitor does’t pass the examination.

诸葛亮：我的四级考试啊，开始哭．．．

What？our monitor does’t pass the examination？But，My English cet band 4 also losed···

（换背景音乐，猪不亮跟着哭，门铃响，猪不亮醉醺醺的摇摇晃晃去开门）

猪不亮：谁啊

Who’s this?

张飞：收水费的

I come here to charge the bill of electricity

（开门，三人一脸嬉笑）

刘备：我们又来了，麻烦小弟通报一下

We are here again,bother to notice your boss.

（猪不亮四下环顾，把礼品接过来了）

（屋子里传来悲伤的气息，张飞和关羽抹眼泪）

张飞：怎么突然一阵感伤涌上心头（自言自语）

I just feel some feeling of sorrow in my heart..

关羽：请问卧龙先生在家吗，我们想见一下（SEE）

Is Mr Zhu Ge home? We want to have a talk with him ,please. 猪不亮：吟诗，见与不见。。。

（你见，或者不见我

It’s doesn’t matter if you see me or not

我就在那里

I am standing right there

不悲不喜

With no emotion

你念，或者不念我

It’s doesn’t matter if you miss me or not

情就在那里

The feeling is right there

不来不去

And it isn’t going anywhere

你爱或者不爱我

It’s doesn’t matter）

篇三：最终用稿(7人搞笑英语版话剧剧本-三顾茅庐)

Three visits to the cottage三顾茅庐

Aside: After their swearing brotherhood to heaven and earth in a peach garden, the three persons——Liubei, Guanyu and Zhangfei-had to be janitors（美['d??n?t?] n. 看门人；守卫） in Caocao's corporation to make a living for they could not find jobs. Meanwhile the legendary and mysterious character ZhuGeliang who had been forced to attend CET-6 test by his wife was reviewing examination contents.

SCENE 1: Liubei's home

Actors: Liubei Guanyu Zhangfei

Guanyu: Brother! We three have been hungry for days and when will this tragic

life end? It's so terrible!

Liubei: Yu, it's impossible that I don't feel painful, isn't it? But as the proverb

says it is hard to sit in Rome and strive against the Pope. Now we come to Caocao's corporation as gatekeeper（看门人）, anyhow we can fill our stomachs between whiles. It's very hard to get work now. No diplomas and no job offers, what are you dreaming about?

Zhangfei: Oh, Brother! ZhuGeliang's wife borrowed us 500yuan to cope with his

husband’s CET-6 fees last month, it seems that it's time for us to be debt collectors now.

Guanyu: Yeah, Brother! Or we'll be as poor as church mouse

Liubei: Alas! How did I forget this? Let's go! Go~~ go~! Hurry up! Follow me

and go to the mountain for dunning! （收拾家伙 挽袖子）

Aside: And then the three brothers climb the mountain to find ZhuGeliang. SCENE 2: ZhuGeliang’s house

Actors: ZhuGeliang Zhu’s Wife

ZhuGeliang: Good morning! I am the genius ZhuGeliang. But I feel so sad recently. Because my wife forced me to pass the CET-6. What’s CET-6? Do you know? I’ve never heart about that. And she asked me to read so heavy books and do so many texts. （拿起手

里的试卷给大家亮亮） It’s ridiculous. My major is military advice, not English. Why should I read this?

Wife: Darling!

ZhuGeliang：My wife is coming，she is so long-winded（啰

嗦的） that I can never bear her. （装作认真状）

Wife： My dear, how about your study? ZhuGeliang：These books make me want to doze[d??z](打瞌睡). I’m dizzy.

Wife： Darling! Now, competition is so serious. If you can’t pass cet-6 to get

your master’s degree, it is difficult to find a job. I have stayed here

for half of a lifetime. But never visit a bigger place like Shanghai.(cry) ZhuGeliang：Don’t worry, these books are too easy for your husband and don’t need to learn. （扔书）

Wife： Are you sure? let me have a test to you. Listen，read and see! ZhuGeliang：A piece of cake!

Wife： Listen, can you spell apple? Desk? ZhuGeliang: Sorry I can’t. （不会 抓耳挠腮）

Wife： You can’t? Oh, how unfortunate I am! (crying) I'm wrong, I'm really

wrong, I'm wrong from the beginning. I shouldn't marry here. If I

didn’t marry here, I'll never in this heartrending place now,

诸葛亮——崩溃了 （捂耳朵 忙劝） ZhuGeliang：Don’t cry, don’t cry, stop! 老婆——（马上变脸） I ‘m going to study hard at once.

Wife: 给书童一个手势

Keeper: What is the matter? Madam?

Wife: Listen carefully! My husband is too busy doing his homework to

welcome any people, so you will tell the people who calls on him that

boss has went to study in England.

Aside: While it is going on, liubei Guanyu Zhangfei have came to the gate of

ZhuGeliang’s house. SCENE3 Outside ZhuGeliang’s house

Actors: Liubei Guanyu Zhangfei Keeper

Zhangfei: Let me knock the door! Open! Open!!! （气愤 敲门 咚 咚 咚）

Keeper: (Check from the peep hole) Are these men asking for the debt?

(Open the door)

Liubei: This is liubei! We are calling on ZhuGeliang and his wife.

Keeper: Zhu said he is not in.

Liubei: En????

Keeper: Oh! No!...I mean …I mean my boss is studying English in England for the

exam of CET-6, and he may not be come back this month.

Liubei: OK! We will wait for him here!

Guanyu: Nobody knows that when he will be come back, so, let’s go home!

Aside: The three men went away with disappointed. After a month, the deeply

autumn came! They came here at the second time. Unfortunately, they didn’t see Zhu Geliang as well. Two month passed, the cold winter is

coming! It is heavy snow and very cold outsides. ZhuGeliang knows the reason that why they come here three times, and orders the keeper to let them come in whiles his wife is out.

SCENE 4: ZhuGeliang’s Home Actors: ZhuGeliang wife liubei Zhangfei Guanyu

ZhuGeliang: Thank goodness, here's Liubei at last. Ha ha ha ………

Wife: Wof! Darling! He may come here to ask me to repay his money. We can’t

let him in. ZhuGeliang: My darling, please don’t worry. I can make liubei go back with nothing by my sliver tongue Liubei: Mr. ZhuGeliang. I have hunted you for a long time! （此时刘备用枪指着诸葛

亮头 幻灯片放无间道） Zhu: Oh! You are Liubei. What can I do for you ?

Liu: my brother, you have borrowed me 500yuan, when you repay it for me? I

have starved for several days. （放乞丐的幻灯片）

ZhuGeliang: I owe you 500yuan? who can testify? Please give me a chance, I want to be an honest man.

Liubei: How can I give you a chance? Speak it to the judge. Zhu: Please look(扇子指向幻灯片 幻灯片放西农地图), although having ambition , you are just a guarder. We can enlarge our power from this base, and then attack Caocao. At last I believe that we can reign the whole country.

Liubei: （若有所思） I’m so surprised! I don’t know you are so smart. Zhu Geliang: If I give you a map, could I not repay your money?

Liubei: En…….you know so much about affairs, are you willing to create a new

country together with us? ZhuGeliang: En……sorry, I can’t. Because my wife forces me to pass the CET-6 recently. If you can help me to resolve the problem, I will help you.

Liu: （面露难色）En….. Zhangfei: （拉刘备到身边耳语到）(Pull) Brother, come here. Everything is fake now such as the milk. Why can’t we find somebody help us do the test or buy a key ? （幻灯片

武状元苏乞儿作弊呢段）

Guanyu: Yes! We can overdraft our salary from Caocao to buy the key at first.

（假答案图片）

SCENE 5: Outside ZhuGeliang’s house

Aside: After receiving the master degree, ZhuGeliang will go to work with Liubei to

establish a new Kingdom.So the couples apart.

Actors: ZhuGeliang Wife Liubei Guanyu Zhangfei

Wife：Honey! ZhuGeliang：Darling!

Wife：Excellent man have a great ambition. You should put cause above

everything else , are sure not to miss me. ZhuGeliang：I will have a long journey .Please take care of yourself.( （转身悄悄说）) Don’t worried, never miss you!! （出门拜倒在久侯的刘备 关羽 张飞脚下） ZhuGeliang：(To Liubei)Your Majesty ( ['m?d??st?]主公), I will never forget your favour. I must be loyal and devoted to the last.

Liubei Guanyu Zhangfei: Let' go!!!!!

Aside: The three men go down to the hill. That is the end of the whole story. Thank you for your attention. （结束时放猫和老鼠的结尾）

旁白——话说刘关张桃园三结义之后四处奔波 一时间找不到工作 不得不在曹操的公司靠看

大门为生 而此时那个传说中的神秘人物诸葛卧龙先生正专心在家复习考试 因为他的老婆黄氏逼着他参加CET-6

场景一

刘备家

刘备 关羽 张飞上

关羽——大哥 咱们都饿了好几天了 这种吃糠咽菜的生活我们要过到什么时候啊 哎

刘备——二弟 这 大哥我怎么可能不难受嘛 可是常言道人在屋檐下 怎能不低头 我们现在曹

操的公司里给人家看大门 这年头工作这么难找 我们三兄弟学历又不高 好不容易能有口饭吃就很不错了 哪还有什么奢求呀

张飞 ——大哥 对了 上个月后面山头诸葛亮的老婆来问我们借走了500块钱去给她老公交

学费去了 都好久没还 我们是不是应该去要回来

关羽——是啊大哥 不然的话这样下去我们就得喝西北风了

刘备——哎 就是 我怎么这岔给忘了 走 走 走 二弟三弟随我这就上山 （收拾家伙 挽袖子） 旁白——兄弟三人就此上山

场景二

诸葛亮家诸葛亮上

诸葛亮——大叫好 我就是绝顶聪明的诸葛亮 可我最近却很是郁闷 我那个娘子非要我去参加

什么大学英语六级考试 六级考试是个什么东西 我怎么听都没听说过 还要我看这么厚的书 做这么多的题（拿起手里的金瓶梅给大家亮亮） 我以后可是要当军师的！！又不是这个专业的 干嘛还要要看这种书

老婆——相公（远处喊）诸葛亮老婆上（比较啰嗦）

诸葛亮——娘子来了 我娘子啰嗦的像唐僧一样 说起话来我可受不了 快老实看书（装作认真

状）

老婆——相公 你的书背的怎么样了

诸葛亮——娘子啊 这些书看得我头昏眼花 光想打瞌睡

老婆——哎 相公呀 你有所不知 你看 现在外面竞争这么激烈 你要是不好好考六级 将来拿

个硕士文凭 以后找不到工作可怎么办呀 我们在这个小村子里都呆了小半辈子了 你看我连稍微大一点的城市 像铁岭都没去过

诸葛亮——娘子 你看老公我这么有才华 以后还愁找不到工作么 这些书太简单了 统统不用

看 （扔书）

老婆——哼 ！！你说简单 那我考考你

诸葛亮——怎么 还要考我 舌战群儒我都不怕 小小考试焉能难道我（对观众说）

老婆——我要考你听写（诸葛亮郁闷状） 听着 apple怎么写 desk怎么写

诸葛亮——（不会 抓耳挠腮）

老婆——相公啊 你连这都不会 可怎么办呀 哎呀 我错了 我真的错了 我从一开始就不应该

嫁过来 如果我不嫁过来 就不会流落到这么一个伤心的地方 我好后悔呀

诸葛亮——崩溃了 （捂耳朵 忙劝）

诸葛亮——娘子莫哭 娘子莫哭 相公好好看书就是

老婆——（马上变脸） 这还差不多 你知道么 为了供你读书 咱们家已经欠了外面一屁股债 连

看大门的我都借过 如果这些人上门来逼债我可怎么办呀

诸葛亮——娘子 你说看大门的 ？ 莫非就是呢个看大门的刘备 （抓胡子 兴奋 点头）

篇四：三顾茅庐英文剧本

Three Visits to the Hut

As the financial crisis spreads across the world, the three persons — LiuBei , GuanYu , and Zhangfei had to be janitors in Caocao’s corporation to make a living for they could not find jobs.

SCENE 1: At LiuBei’s home

Actors:LiuBei GuanYu and ZhangFei

Guanyu:Brother!We three have been hungry for days and what should we do? It’s so terrible!

Liubei: Yu, it’s impossible that I don’t feel painful, is’t it? But it’s very hard to get work now. You know? We have no diplomas (学位证书),of course there’s no jobs, What are you dreaming about?

Zhangfei: Oh,Brother! ZhuGeliang’s wife borrowed us 500 dollars last month , it’s time for us to be debt collecters now.

Guanyu: Yeah, Borther! We are as poor as church mouse now.

Liubei: Alas! How did I forget this? Let’s go! Go～Go～!Hurry up! Follow me and go to the mountain for dunning(催逼讨债)!

Aside: And then the three brothers set out to find ZhuGeliang.

Meanwhile the legendary and mysterious character ZhuGeliang had been forced to attend CET-6 by his wife.

SCENE 2:ZhuGeLiang’s house

Actor: ZhuGeLiang , Wife and keeper

ZhuGeliang: Good morning everyone! I am the genius ZhuGeliang. My major is Military(军人) and I love it so much!

I feel so morose(郁闷的) recently. Because my wife forced me to pass the CET-6(College English Test) and obliged me to do so many texts. What’s CET-6? Do you know? … It is ridiculous [r?'d?kj?l?s], I never heard about that.

Wife: Darling!

ZhuGeliang: My wife is coming, she is so long-winded that I can never bear her.

Wife: My dear, how about your study?

ZhuGeliang: These books make me want to doze. I’m dizzy.

Wife: Darling! Now, the competition is so serious. If you can’t pass CET-6 to get your master’s degree, it is difficult to find a job. I have stayed here for half of my lifetime. But never visited a bigger place like tianjin

ZhuGeliang: Don’t worry, these books are too easy for your husband and don’t need to learn.

Wife: Are you sure? Let me have a test .

ZhuGeliang: A piece of cake!

Wife: Listen, can you spell APPLE? DESK?

ZhuGeliang: Sorry I can’t

Wife: You can’t? Oh how unfortunate I am! I’m wrong, I’m really wrong, I’m wrong at the beginning. I should’t marry here. I’ll never in this heartreading place now.

ZhuGuliang: Don’t cry! Don’t cry! Stop! I’m going to study hard . Wife: That’s the spirit! Do you know? We are too poor to support the fees of CET-6. I even borrowed money from the gate keeper. What can I do when they ask for debts.

ZhuGeliang: Are you pointing to that gatekeeper which called Liubei? Wife: Oh! Yes! Come on quickly! Boy!

Keeper: What’s the matter? Madam?

Wife: Listen carefully! My husband is too busy doing his homework to meet any people, so you must tell the people who calls on him that the boss has gone to study in England.

Keeper: Yes! Madam!

Aside: While it is going on, Liubei Guanyu Zhangfei have came to the gate of ZhuGeliang’s house.

Scene3 outside ZhuGeliang’s house

Actors:Luibei Zhangfei Keeper

Zhangfei: Let me strike the door! Open! Open!

Keeper: Are these men asking for the debts?

Liubei: This is Liubei! We are calling on ZhuGeliang and his wife.

Keeper: Zhu said he is not in.

Liubei: En???

Keeper: Oh! No! …I mean… I mean my boss is studying English in England for the exam of CET-6, and he may not come back this mouth Liubei: OK! We are waiting for him here!

Guanyu: Let’s go home, let him alone.

Liubei: Wait! Noboby knows that when he will come back, thus let’s go home for lunch.

Aside:The three men went away with disappointment.

Scene 4 Outside ZhuGeliang’s house

Aside:Three months passed, ZhuGeliang knows the reason that why they come here three times, and orders the keeper to let them come in , whiles his wife is outside.

The cold winter is coming! It is extremely cold outside.

Zhangfei: Please tell me when you see him next time, let me bind him up for you. It really should not trouble you to come here again and again. Liubei: Calm down! Calm down! Now, the borrower is god!

Keeper: My boss is at home today, but he is reading books about CET-6.Please wait for a moment!

Zhangfei: Zhu! Come out! Brothers! Take care of my seventh uncle and his third niece. Get out! Or I will burn you house down.

Guanyu: Silence! We are here for debt not for his life.

Keeper: Don’t interrupt! Boss is reading!

Liubei: Keep quiet!!!! Show we the way please!

Liubei: Mr Zhu, we have hunted you for a long time.

ZhuGeliang: Oh! M.r Liu take a seat please. What can I do for you? Liubei: My dailing brother, you have borrowed me $500, when will you repay it for me? I have starved for several days.

ZhuGeliang: I’m sorry, I have no money, but I can assist you to win the country to pay off my debt.

Liubei: However, your wife won’t set you free?

ZhuGeliang: That’s too easy! The only thing I need to do is to pass the CET-6.

ZhangFei: Verbal statements are no guarantee. How can you realize it? Liubei: I believe that M.r. zhu is a gentleman.

ZhuGeLiang: I’m such a brilliant genius that knows astronomy and geography. Besides, I am born with natural beauty and bright beyond people’s imagination.

Zhangfei: If so, how can you fail the CET-6?

Guanyu: Be polite to the gentleman.

ZhuGeliang: Because I don’t want to pass it deliberately. [d?'l?b?r?tl?] Liubei: Why?

字数作文