200分 帮忙设计3篇英语板报截至到1.6号不需要太复杂也不要太简单每篇一页 根据高中英语的内容设计 内容空洞也行只要不夸张就行 （初二的英语内容也行.word做得就行）我希望做成像黑板报

200分 帮忙设计3篇英语板报截至到1.6号不需要太复杂也不要太简单每篇一页 根据高中英语的内容设计 内容空洞也行只要不夸张就行 （初二的英语内容也行.word做得就行）我希望做成像黑板报
200分 帮忙设计3篇英语板报截至到1.6号
不需要太复杂也不要太简单每篇一页 根据高中英语的内容设计 内容空洞也行只要不夸张就行 （初二的英语内容也行.word做得就行）
我希望做成像黑板报那样的就行用作网页的东西也行
要成文的！现在忙没有时间所以出此下策

200分 帮忙设计3篇英语板报截至到1.6号不需要太复杂也不要太简单每篇一页 根据高中英语的内容设计 内容空洞也行只要不夸张就行 （初二的英语内容也行.word做得就行）我希望做成像黑板报
初一年级学习幽默学单词系列
学英语是一件需要熟练的工作,下面准备了一些幽默句子,希望多看、多读.如果有些看不懂,可以先看汉语,有了兴趣,再想法学习用英语怎么说.既然想学英语,那么就尽量培养自己的兴趣吧.如果你认识这写单词,也希望你能看完这些句子,学习如何灵活使用单词.
name
I can’t remember your name, but don’t tell me.
我记不住你的名字了,但不要告诉我.
注：我根本不想知道你的名字.
场景再现：你在和一个久未见面的小学同学打电话时说：
I remember your name, but I just can’t remember your face.
我记得你的名字,但我就是想不起你长什么样了.
场景再现：8岁孩子眼里的爱情,他语重心长地说：
“Don’t forget your wife’s name. That will mess up [搞糟] the love.” —— Erin, age 8
不要忘记太太的名字,那样会把爱情弄得一团糟.
Don’t worry. I forgot your name, too!
别担心,我也忘了你的名字.
注：两人老同学见面,你看见对方好象忘了你的名字,挺尴尬的,你可以这么说.
If the President calls, please get his name.
如果总统打来电话,请记下他的名字.
注：这么说表示他认识很多总统.
clock
Why didn’t the clock work?
It needed a hand.
为什么钟表不工作?
它需要帮手（指针）
注：Hand：帮手；指针.
What did the digital clock say to the mother clock?
Look, mom, no hands.
数字表对妈妈表说什么?——看,妈妈,没有手（指针）.
注：Hand：手；指针.
Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window?
Because he wanted to see time fly.
为什么小男孩把钟表扔出窗外?
因为他想看着时光飞逝.
nice
场景再现：汽车标贴：
I’m busy. You’re ugly. Have a nice day.
我很忙,你很丑,祝玩儿得愉快.
How do salesmen traditionally greet each other?
“Hi. Nice to meet you. I’m better than you.”
销售人员一般怎么打招呼?
“咳,很高兴见到你,我比你好”.
注：销售员一见别人的面就要迫不及待地说自己的产品比别的产品好,但直截了当地说自己比别人好就有点儿过了.
Be nice to your kids. They’ll choose your nursing home.
要善待你的小孩,他们给你选养老院.
注：特别是现在只有一个孩子,当父母的没有选择的余地.
meet
Actress： Let me introduce my husband to you.
Director： I am always glad to meet any husband of yours.
女演员：请允许我向你介绍我的丈夫.
导演：见到你任何一个丈夫我都很荣幸.（导演的意思是女演员经常换丈夫）
A boy frog telephones the Psychic Hotline and his Personal Psychic Advisor tells him： “You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you.”
The frog is thrilled, “This is great! Will I meet her at a party?”
“No,” says his Advisor, “in her biology class.”
一个雄性小青蛙打通心灵热线,他的私人心理咨询师告诉他,“你将遇到一个年轻美貌的女孩,她想知道你所有的事情”.
小青蛙很激动,“太棒了,我会在晚会上遇见她吗?”
“不,在她的生物课上”.
注：就看汉语就行了.
hello
What do you say to a two-headed space alien?——Hello, hello.
你冲长着两个脑袋的外星人说什么?——你好,你好
question
What letter is a question?
Y
什么字母是个问题?
Y （why）
Excuse me, you’re an attorney, aren’t you? If I pay you $200, will you answer me three questions?
What is your third question?
打扰一下,您是一位律师,对吗?如果我付你200美元,您能回答我三个问题吗?
你的第三个问题是什么?
注：律师很值钱.
What question can never be answered yes?
Are you asleep?
什么问题永远不能回答“是”?——你睡着了吗?
look
Ed： Want to see something stupid?
Fred： Sure.
Ed： Look in the mirror.
Ed：想看一些愚蠢的东西吗?
Fred：当然.
Ed：照照镜子.
Trixie： I dropped a quarter in the other room.
Dixie： So why are you looking for it here?
Trixie： The light’s better in here.
Trixie：我在另一个房间里掉了二毛五分硬币.
Dixie：那你为什么在这儿找呢?
Trixie：这儿比较亮.
answer
场景再现：老师说你说错了,你敢不敢说：
Maybe it’s a not a wrong answer —— maybe it’s just a different answer.
可能答案没错——可能只是一个不同的答案.
Why is Jim praying that Chicago will be made the capital of New Jersey?
That’s the answer he put on his Geography paper.
为什么Jim祈祷Chicago是New Jersey的州府?
那是他地理试卷上的答案.
first
Overheard this on a London bus：
First Woman： “I don’t know what to get my husband for his birthday.”
Second Woman： “Why don’t you get him a book?”
First Woman： （after a moment’s thought） “Nah, he’s already got a book.”
在伦敦公共汽车上听到的对话：
女人1：我不知道该给我丈夫送什么生日礼物.
女人2：为什么不给他送本书?
女人1：（想了一会儿）可他已经有一本书了.
Travis： Hey, Matt, I know how to drop an egg three feet without it breaking!
Matt： How?
Travis： Just drop it from four feet up. So for the first three feet, it won’t break!
Travis：嘿,Matt,我知道怎样让一个鸡蛋落下三尺还不破?
Matt：怎样?
Travis：从四尺高的地方扔下,前三尺鸡蛋不会破.
First-grade son： I have won a prize in my class
Mother： I’m proud of you. What have you achieved?
Son： I have the oldest mom in the whole class.
上一年级的儿子：我在班上获奖了.
妈妈：我真为你感到骄傲,你取得了什么成绩获得奖?
儿子：全班同学中我的妈妈最老.
last
George dreamed a wonderful dream last night, he felt good.
“I dream that I got 100 in English. What does it mean?”
“It means that you study very hard in your dream.”
George昨天晚上做了个美梦,他感觉好极了.
“我梦见我英语考了100分,这意味着什么?”
“这意味着你在梦里学习很用功”.
boy
The teacher blamed the boy because he didn’t wash his face before coming to school.
“I can see you had eggs for breakfast.”
“You are wrong. That was yesterday.”
老师斥责男孩来学校前没有洗脸,“我能看出来你早饭吃的鸡蛋”.
“您错了,那是昨天的”.
girl
Boy： My father got me a turtle instead of a dog, and I hate it.
Girl： Why?
Boy： Do you know how long it takes me to walk my pet every day?
男孩儿：我爸爸没有给我狗,给了我一只乌龟,我恨它.
女孩儿：为什么?
男孩儿：你知道每天遛我的宠物要花多长时间吗?
zero
场景再现：小孩儿问的问题：
If it’s zero degrees outside today and it’s supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
如果今天外面是零度,明天要比今天冷两倍,明天会有多冷?
Mother： What is the idea of this zero on your report card?
Son： That’s no zero. Teacher ran out of stars so she gave me a moon.
妈妈：你成绩单上的零是什么意思?
儿子：那不是零,老师用完了星星,她给了我个月亮.
One two three
The father asked his son to divide candy with his younger brother.
“How did you divide them, then?”
“It is difficult to divide three pieces between two people, so I ate one first.”
父亲让男孩和他弟弟分糖吃.
“你怎么分的?”
“两个人分三块糖太难了,所以我先吃了一块”.
Three six
What has six eyes but can’t see?
Three blind mice.
什么东西有六只眼睛,但是看不见?
三只瞎老鼠.
four
What has four legs buy can’t move?
A table.什么东西有四条腿但不能动?
桌子.
five
Can you name five things that contain milk?
Butter and cheese, ice-cream and two cows.
你能列举五个包含牛奶的东西吗?
黄油、奶酪、冰激凌和两头奶牛.
seven
Open seven days a week. Closed Sundays.
一周营业7天,星期天关门.
注：一家匹萨店外卖菜单上写着这样的话.自相矛盾是幽默的一种.
eight
If you had ten apples and ate eight, how many would you have?
Ten. Two outside and eight inside.
如果你有10个苹果,吃了8个,你还有几个?
两个在外面,8个在里面.
nine
A horse was tied to a rope five feet long, and wanted to eat the hay nine feet away. Could he manage that?
Sure. The rope wasn’t tied to anything.
一匹马系在了一根5英尺长的绳子上,他想去吃9英尺外的干草,他能吃到吗?
当然能,绳子没有绑在任何东西上.
Two little boys wanted to ask a favor of their mother.
“You ask her,” said Paul, age ten.
“No,” said Roy, age nine, “You ask her. You’ve known her longer than I have.”
两个小男孩想请妈妈帮忙.
10岁的Paul说,“你去问她”.
9岁的Roy说,“你问她,你认识她时间比我长”.
telephone
Mick： How do you converse with a crocodile?
Keith： By long-distance telephone!
Mick：你如何同鳄鱼交谈?
Keith：用长途电话.
number
Father： Wow, I’m impressed. You were on the phone for only thirty minutes. Most of your calls last two hours.
Teenager： Wrong number.
父亲：哇,这次你给我的印象深刻,你只打了30分钟电话,你大部分电话要打两个小时.
青少年：打错了.
注：这家伙够能聊的,打错了电话还能侃30分钟.
card
Dad： What is the meaning of this F on your report card?
Junior： Fantastic?
爸爸：你成绩单上的F是什么意思?
Junior：棒极了.
场景再现：当爸爸看到税款、租金、电话、服装、食品的帐单时很生气,因为所有的费用都在不断地上涨.
“我希望看到哪怕一样下降的东西”.
“Dad, here is my report card.”“爸爸,这是我的成绩单”.
family
Which American has the largest family?
George Washington, “father of the nation.”
哪个美国人有最大的家庭?
乔治 华盛顿,他是“民族之父”.
如果这些单词你都记住了,我免费称赞你.每学一个单词,最好自己能够模仿文中的句子再造一个句子,那就真会用了,可以把句子贴上来,供大家嘲笑.
打了好长时间,我的书上都有,希望对你有帮助,谢谢.

大侠不是大虾