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英语小笑话带翻译简单

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英语小笑话带翻译简单体裁作文

篇一:经典英语小笑话带翻译

1、Be Careful What You Wish For

A couple had been married for 25 years and were celebrating their 60th birthdays, which fell on the same day.

During the celebration a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple for all 25 years, she would give them one wish each.

The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her hand, and Boom! She had the tickets in her hand.

Next, it was the husband's turn. He paused for a moment, then said shyly, "Well, I'd like to have a woman 30 years younger than me."

The fairy picked up her wand, and Boom! He was ninety.

慎重许愿

一对结婚25周年的夫妻在庆祝他们六十岁的生日。他们恰好在同一天出生。

庆祝活动中,一位仙女出现了。她说,由于他们是已经结婚25年的恩爱夫妻,因此她给许给这对夫妻每个人一个愿望。

妻子想周游世界。仙女招了招手。“呯!”的一声,她的手中出现了一张票。

接下来该丈夫许愿了。他犹豫片刻,害羞地说,“那我想要一位比我年轻30岁的女人。”

仙女拾起了魔术棒。“呯!”,他变成了90岁。

2、All Right

Hurrying my 11-year old daughter to school, I made a right turn at a red light when it was prohibited. "Uh-oh," I said, realizing my mistake. "I just make an illegal turn."

"I guess it's all right." my daughter replied, "The police car behind us did the same thing."

没关系

我赶着开车将11岁的女儿送到学校去,在红灯处右拐了,而那是不允许的(译注:在一些国家如英国,其交通规则是车辆左行的,与我国相反)。“啊噢,”意识到犯了错误,我说。“我刚才拐弯是违章的。”

“我想那没关系的,”女儿回答说:“我们后面的警车也同样拐了弯。”

更多英语学习方法:企业英语培训

篇二:英语小笑话带翻译版

英语小笑话带翻译版,六个关于英语的小笑话希望您笑,笑一笑十年少!

1 那就更糟了 Much Worse

Much Worse

Policeman: Why didn't you shout for help when you were robbed of your watch?

Man: If I had opened my mouth, they'd have found my four gold teeth. That would be much worse.

中文:

警察:有人抢你的手表时,你为什么不呼救呢?

男子:要是我张口的话,他们就会发现我的四颗金牙。那就更糟了。

2林肯过生日 Great Event

Teacher: What great event happened in 1809?

Little Willy: Abraham Lincoln was born.

Teacher: Correct. And what great event happened in 1812?

Little Willy: Abraham Lincoln had his third birthday.

老师:1809年发生了什么重大事件?

小威利:亚伯拉罕-林肯诞生。

老师:正确。那么1812年发生了什么重要事件呢?

小威利:亚伯拉罕-林肯过他的三周岁生日。

3 Talking clock

会说话的钟

While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into the den. "What is the big brass gong and hammer for?" one of his friends asked. "That is the talking clock," the man replied. "How's it work?"

"Watch," the man said and proceeded to give the gong an ear shattering pound with the hammer. Suddenly, someone screamed from the other side of the wall, "Knock it off, you idiot! It's two o'clock in the morning!"

一个学生带他朋友们参观他的新公寓,甚是得意。“那个大铜锣和锤子是干什么用的?”他的一个朋友问他。“那玩意儿厉害了,那是一个会说话的钟”,学生回答。“这钟怎么工作的”,他的朋友问。“看着,别眨眼了”,那学生走上前一把操起铜锣和锤子,拼命地敲了一下,声音震耳欲聋。突然,他们听到隔壁墙那边有人狂叫,“别敲了,你这白痴!现在是凌晨两点钟了!”

4、The Mean Man's Party

吝啬鬼的聚会

The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, "Come up to the fifth floor and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot."

"Why use my elbow and foot?"

"Well, gosh," was the reply, "You're not coming empty-handed, are you?"短信笑话www.dxpei.com

一个声名狼藉的小气鬼终于决定要请一次客了。他在向一个朋友解释怎么找到他家时说:“你上到五楼,用你的胳膊肘按门铃。门开了后,再用你的脚把门推开。”

“为什么我要用我的肘和脚呢?”

“天哪!” 吝啬鬼回答,“你总不会空着手来吧?”

5.Good Boy

Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"

"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered. AD:joozone_com

"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"

"She is the one who sells the candy."

好孩子

小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。

“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”

“我给了一个可怜的老太婆,”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?”

“她是个卖糖果的。”

6.Nest and Hair

My sister, a primary school teacher, was informed by one of her pupils that a bird had built its nest in the tree outside the classroom.

"What kind of bird?" my sister asked.

"I didn't see the bird, ma' am, only the nest," replied the child.

"Then, can you give us a description of the nest?" my sister encouraged her .

"Well, ma'am, it just resembles your hair. "

Notes:

(1) inform v.告诉

(2) nest n.窝;巢

(3) description n.描述

(4) encourage v.鼓励

(5) resemble v. 相似;类似

动物笑话 爆笑短信:鸟窝与头发

我姐姐是一位小学老师。一次一个学生告诉

英语小笑话带翻译简单

她说一只鸟儿在教室外 的树上垒了个窝。 “是什么鸟呢?”我姐姐问她。

“我没看到鸟儿,老师,只看到鸟窝。”那孩子回答说。

“那么,你能给我们描述一下这个鸟巢吗?”我姐姐鼓励她道。

“哦,老师,就像你的头发一样。”

本文来自:短信大全(),英语短笑话带翻译,关于英语的小笑话:/duanxinxiaohua/2212.html

篇三:英语小笑话(带翻译))

1 Boy: Is this seat empty? Girl: Yes and this one will be if you sit down. 男孩:这个座位是空的么? 女孩:是的,如果你坐下,我的座位也将是空的。 2,Boy: Can I buy you a drink? Girl: Actually I'd rather have the money. 男孩:我可以给你买杯饮料吗? 女孩:你不如直接把钱给我得了。 3. My little dog can't read Mrs. Brown: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog! Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers! Mrs. Brown: It's no use, my little dog can't read. 我的狗不识字 布朗夫人:哦, 亲爱的,我把珍爱的小狗给丢了! 史密斯夫人:可是你该在报纸上登广告啊! 布朗夫人:没有用的,我的小狗不认识字。 ” 4.反正我太太明天会来换的My Wife Will Exchange ThemA gentleman walks into a store and asked for a pair of gloves. ″Cloth or leather﹖″ asked the salesperson. ″Makes no difference  ″replied customer. ″What color﹖″ asked the clerk. ″Any″ he responded. ″Size﹖″ ″Give me whatever you prefer″ the gentleman said slightly exasperated. ″My wife will be back tomorrow t o exchange them.″ 反正我太太明天会来换的 一位先生走进一家商店要买副手套。 “您是要布的还是皮的?”售货员问。

“没什么区别。”这位顾客回答。 “那您要什么颜色的呢?”售货员又问。 “什么颜色都成。”他回答。 “号码呢?” “您就随便给我拿一副吧,”这位顾客有点不耐烦了,“反正我太太明天都会来换的。”5.A physics Examination Once in a physics examination, Nick finished the first question very soon, while his class mates were thinking it hard. The question was: When it thunders why do we see the lighting first, then hear the thund er rolls? Nick‘s answer: Because our eyes are before ears. 一次物理考试 在一次物理考试时,当同学们都还在苦思冥想时,尼克很快就答好了第一个问题。 这个问题是:为什么在打雷时,我们总是先看到闪电后听到雷声? 尼克的回答是:因为眼睛在前,耳朵在后。 6. Jim’s History Examination Uncle: How did Jim do in his history examination? Mother: Oh, not at all well, but there, it wasn't his fault. They asked him things that happened before the poor boy was born. 吉姆的历史考试 舅舅:吉姆这孩子历史考得怎么样? 母亲:唉,糟透了。可话又说回来,这也不能怪他。嗨,他们尽问一些这个可怜的孩子出生 前的事儿。 7.he is really somebody -- My uncle has 1000 men under him. -- He is really somebody. What does he do?

-- A maintenance man in a cemetery. 他真是一个大人物 -- 我叔叔下面有 1000 个人。 -- 他真是一个大人物。干什么的? -- 墓地守墓人。 8 I Have His Ear in My Pocket Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?" "A kid bit me," replied Ivan. "Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother. "I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket." 他的耳朵在我衣兜里 伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问,“发生了什么事?” “一个男孩咬了我一口,”伊凡说。 “再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问。 “他走到哪里我都能认出他,”伊凡说。“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。” 9 Three-year-old boy took a three-year-old girl's hand and said: "I love you." The little girl said: "can you get me for the future?" The little boy said: "of course can, we're not one or two years old!" 一个三岁小男孩拉着一个三岁小女孩的手说:“我爱你。”小女孩说:“你能为我的未来负责 吗?”小男孩说:“当然能,我们都不是一两岁的人了! 10. Bedtime Prayers Julie was saying her bedtime prayers. "Please God," she said, "Make Naples the capital of Italy. Make Naples the capital of Italy." Her mother interrupted and said, "Julie, why do you want God to make Naples the capital of Italy?" And Julie replied, "Because that/’s what I put in my geography exam!" 睡前祷告词 朱莉叶在做睡前祷告。“祷告上帝,”她说,“让那不勒斯成为意大利的首都吧。让那不勒斯 成为意大利的首都吧。” 妈妈打断她说:“朱莉叶,你为什么求上帝让那不勒斯成为意大利的首都呢?” 朱莉叶回答说:“因为我在地理考卷上是这么写的。”

篇四:英语小笑话 带翻译

One day a person meet god ... ...

God suddenly decide to give the man a wish ... ...

God asked ... ...

What wishes do you have ... ...

The man thinking ... ...

Heard that cats have9 lives ... ...

Would you please give me9 lives ... ...

God said ... ...

Your wish come true ... ...

One day, the boring ... Want to say one death to die ... ...

There are9 life lying on the tracks ... ...

The results of a train in the past ... ...

The man was dead ... ...

Why is this?

Because the train compartment having10day ... ...

有个人一天碰到上帝......

上帝突然大发善心打算给那人一个愿望......

上帝问......

你有什么愿望吗......

那个人想了想......

听说猫都有9条命......

那请您赐给我9条命吧......

上帝说...... 你的愿望实现咯......

一天,那个人闲来无聊...... 想说去死一死算了......

反正有9条命嘛 就躺在铁轨上......

结果一辆火车开过去......

那人还是死了......

这是为什么呢?

因为那列火车的车厢有10节......

Music class the teacher played a Beethoven song

Xiao Ming asked her:" do you understand music?"

Xiaohua:" yes"

Xiao Ming:" you know what teachers do in the shells?"

Xiaohua:" piano."

音乐课上 老师弹了一首贝多芬的曲子

小明问小华:“你懂音乐吗?”

小华:“是的”

小明:“那你知道老师在弹什麼吗?”

小华: “钢琴。”

Traveler: Can I catch the three o'clock train to Toronto?

Ticket agent: That depends on how fast you can run. It left fifteen minutes ago.

旅行者:我还能赶上3点钟那班到多伦多的火车吗?

售票员:那得看你跑得有多快。火车15分钟前开出。

篇五:英语小笑话大全附带翻译版下载

1、早晨老婆问:我胸小吗?

1 morning, wife ask: my chest is small?

老公:那得看和谁比了。

Husband: it depends on and who is the.

妻怒问:你还在哪见过别人胸?

Wife angrily asked: do you still have seen others chest?

老公:男澡堂。

Husband: male bath.

2、周末赖床,搂着老公说:“有来生的话,我就选择做被褥!”

2, the weekend snooze, hugging the husband said: "there is a next life, I will choose to do bedding!"

他问:“为什么啊?”

He asked: "why ah?"

我回答:“因为被褥每天不是躺在床上就是在晒太阳,多爽啊!” I answered: "because the bedding every day instead of lying in bed is in the sun, more cool!"

这货说:“哦,吓我一跳!我还以为你想天天被人睡。”

He said: "Oh, you scared me! I thought you wanted to be sleep every day."

3、今天和老公一起逛街,看到一家体育用品店。二货老公突然说:老婆,我们去买些体育用品吧。

3, today and husband go shopping, see a sporting goods store. Idiot

husband suddenly say: wife, we went to buy some sports activities. 我:你想买啥呢?

I: what you want to buy?

老公:套套?

Husband: condom...

4、有次我和老公在大街上,看见两条狗在互闻屁屁,我就问他:你说狗为什么要用鼻子闻啊?

4, once I and husband in the street, saw two dogs in each smell fart fart, I ask him: you say why dogs to smell?

他:那是因为它没手,不然就用手摸了。

He: it is because it has no hands, or touch the.

1、下午窗口没人。有个小孩儿趴在我柜台上玩笔,玩着玩着抬起头,伸手戳了戳玻璃,眨着水汪汪的大眼睛问我:“你为什么被关起来了?”

1, no one afternoon window. A baby lying play pen on my desk, playing raised his head, hand poked glass, blinking watery eyes and asked me: "Why are you locked up?"

我笑着对他说:“因为姐姐不好好读书。”

I smiled and said to him: "because my sister do not make good reading." 他瘪瘪嘴:“你骗人。”

He shriveled mouth: "you lie."

我说:“真的,没骗你。”

I said: "really, not lying to you."

他摇头,很认真地反驳我:“你就是骗人,你明明是阿姨。”

He shook his head, refute me very seriously: "you is cheating, you obviously are aunt."

2、一次去哥哥家吃饭,吃饭时老婆给侄女夹了块肉,老婆说:小侄女,你说婶子和你叔叔谁对你好??

2, once went to his brother to eat, eat wife for my niece with a piece of meat, the wife say: my niece, aunt and uncle who you say you are...... 大侄子说:当然是叔叔啦,

Great nephew said: of course it's uncle,

老婆说:为什么啊,

The wife say: why ah,

侄女说:因为叔叔永远是我叔叔,婶子就不一定啦??

Niece said: because my uncle is my uncle always, aunt is not necessarily......

3、那天,偶然看到儿子交给老师的作业《我最喜爱的家庭成员》。 3, that day, happened to see his teacher to work "my favorite family member".

作业中儿子像列家谱一般提到爷爷,奶奶,妈妈,姥姥。。。可到结尾处笔锋一转,写道:“要说家里我最喜欢的是谁,相信你们已经猜到了,当然是我的爸爸。

Operation in the column is generally referred to as their son Grandpa,

grandma, mother, grandmother... To the end point, wrote: "to say who is my best love in the home, you guessed it, of course, is my father. 其他人对我十分严厉,只有爸爸最好。。。”

Other people is very hard on me, only the best dad..."

我心花怒放,可等我翻至下页时,却见第一行行首写着两个字----欺负。

I be wild with joy, but when I turned to the next page, but see the first lines written two words ---- bully.

4、一小孩子坐在地上哭,嘴里哭喊着要妈妈伸手拉他起来,他妈妈却伸出一条腿给他说:“你自己抱着爬起来!”

4, a child sitting on the ground crying, crying for mom mouth stretched out his hand and took him up, his mother was out a leg and said to him: "you hold up!"

结果宝宝哭着说:“呜呜,不行!”

The baby cried and said: "Oh, no.!"

他妈说:“那你要怎样?”

His mother said: "how will you?"

宝宝抽噎着回答:“我要抱那条腿!”

The baby crying replied: "I want to hold the leg!"

5、有个熊孩子喜欢打人,一天,那熊孩子生气地对一个小孩说:“我要收拾你”之后打了那个小孩,时间流逝,“收拾”对他来说是打。 5, there is a bear like a child, one day, the boy said to bear a child angrily:

"I will punish you" after the child, the passage of time, the "pack" for him is to play.

有一天他妈妈对他说;“你的房间好乱,去给我收拾收拾。”

One day his mother said to him; "your room is so messy, to give me up." “好滴”一小时后,熊孩子出来,妈妈进去看,卧槽,凳子被他‘收拾’翻了。玻璃瓶碎了一地,蚊帐被他打得散架了。

"OK" after an hour, bear children, mother went in to see, lying trough, stools were he 'clean' over. A land of broken glass bottles, nets were he played apart.

他妈苦笑,说:“果然是‘收拾’啊。”

Fuck forced smile, said: "it is a 'clean'."

1、一次去公厕小解,尿急没仔细看就进去了。当时我就凌乱了,里面有两个妇女,我找一个坑迅速蹲了下去,完事就提裤走了出来,真尴尬啊。[来自我要看笑话www.51kxh.cn]

1, a trip to the toilet to urinate, micturition not carefully look into. I was just messy, there are two women, I am looking for a pit quickly squat down, it will lift pants out, really embarrassing.

这时后面一女人说:“哎玛,我以为是男的呢!原来是个女汉子...” Then a woman said: "Hey, I think, is the man! It was a female..."

2、男友想逗女友乐一下,于是说:二十年前,我的一块手表掉到咱前院的水井里,昨天捞上来,竟然还在运转,而且走时准确,真不可思议。

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